


Glass

by AllyThePotato



Series: And Why Is That? [8]
Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, Crying, Denial of Feelings, Guilt, Infidelity, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-15 04:20:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29802822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllyThePotato/pseuds/AllyThePotato
Summary: It's hopeless—He knows it's unfixable—It's destroyed—
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel, Kurt Hummel/Sebastian Smythe
Series: And Why Is That? [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2181036
Comments: 40
Kudos: 37





	Glass

**Author's Note:**

  * For [backslashdelta](https://archiveofourown.org/users/backslashdelta/gifts), [Carmex](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carmex/gifts), [ohjeezglee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohjeezglee/gifts).



> Part 8 of And Why Is That   
> First one not named after the repetition but alas, here we are. It's a Kurt chapter :)
> 
> Don't forget to check out the podfics!!!!
> 
> Enjoy, loves!
> 
> For my little fan club. Yall make life better. Muah!!

Kurt looks at Blaine. He's reading, legs pulled up underneath him and glasses falling down his nose, hair loosely falling into his face. Kurt's lips curve up into the smallest of smiles. "I love you," Kurt says.

Blaine looks up from his book, eyebrows raised. "That was unwarranted," he responds. The side of his mouth lifts into a half grin. "But I love you, too." He winks before looking back down at his book. Kurt laughs lightly, and for a second it's almost how it used to be. Before—

Before.

Kurt shakes his head. He looks at Blaine again, sitting on the other end of the couch. Once upon a time, there would have been no distance between them. Blaine's affectionate like that, and it never occurred to Kurt to mind. But now Blaine is sitting on the opposite end of the couch, and the worst part about it is that it seems natural, like Blaine didn't think twice about it. He's just—

Sitting on the far end of the couch.

Kurt exhales. This natural distance, it's his fault. These unsaid words, these silent feelings—they're his fault. This is what happens when you—when you—

When you fuck someone else. When you fall in love with someone else. When you hide it. When you know you're fucked up. When you destroy something beautiful from the inside. When you've been living a  _ lie _ since high school. This is what happens. Natural distance. 

Something so small, yet so pivotal. 

This is what happens when you—

He gets up, goes into the kitchen. He's not thirsty, but he makes a glass of water anyway, downs it in one go. He makes another, drinks it slower. Leans against the kitchen counter, closes his eyes. Breathe—

This is what happens when you—

Breathe—

Fucking  _ breathe— _

This is what happens when you—

The glass slips out of his hand, shatters on the floor. Kurt’s eyes fly open and he's on his knees, trying to pick up the glass, to fix it, to fix this, to put it back together again—

"Kurt, stop," he hears. He doesn't look up—can't, won't. "Kurt. Kurt—you're cutting your hands, stop. I'll get the broom—" 

"I broke it," Kurt says. "I broke it. I'm sorry, Blaine. I broke it." 

He still doesn't look up, just keeps trying to put the shards back together, tries to save what's left—

It's hopeless—

He knows it's unfixable—

It's destroyed—

This is what happens when you—

"I broke it," he says again. "Blaine, I'm sorry—I didn't mean to, I just—I lost control...I can't fix it—I'm sorry."

He's crying, he can feel it. "Kurt," Blaine says quietly, he's kneeling in front of him. "Kurt, look at me." 

Kurt looks up, choking back a sob. "I broke it," he repeats. 

"I know," Blaine says. "It's okay." 

This is what happens when you—

"It's not okay. I'm sorry," Kurt says again. 

Blaine swallows, and Kurt knows he's trying not to cry by the way his jaw is set. "I know," he repeats. He stands and gets the broom, cleans the mess and then cleans Kurt's hands. Kurt apologizes the entire time, tears rolling down his face. Blaine doesn’t say it's okay. He doesn't say anything, actually. 

After, when everything is back in order and they're sitting on the couch, Kurt’s tears finally stop. Blaine is next to him now, a hand on his leg. "I'm sorry." 

Blaine turns towards him, kisses him under his jaw. "I know," he says against the skin there. "But not now."

"Okay," Kurt says. "I love you." 

"I love you, too," Blaine chokes out. He's teasing at the skin on his neck, sure to leave a mark. Kurt knows what he wants, and responds in kind, slipping a hand under Blaine’s shirt. But Kurt feels the tears, too.

He's broken it. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!!!


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